The "I" in Involved

Being involved is about more than baking cookies these days. It seems that everywhere you turn there is a way to sign up, donate, give time and more when it comes to being a part of your kids educations. There is no right or wrong way to do it. There's just finding the YOUR PLACE in involvement. The "I", as I like to call it. It doesn't matter what you do, just as long as you're doing it - and doing it the way that makes sense for you and your family.

Being involved can take the shape of many things. It can be the parent who is there every night that reads, checks the homework, plays "hi/lo" at the dinner table (one of my fave's), and recounts the daily gossip between family members. We keep up to date and up to speed on our kids lives like this. We find out what's going on, and we communicate. We are involved. This type of involvement may not take the shape of the daily school interaction of PTO meetings, volunteering in the classroom, or baking 200 homemade cupcakes, but it's serious involvement. And it counts - big time.

There's the involvement of the parent that volunteers at the school in any way needed. This parent is the first on the sign up sheets, chairs or co-chairs committees, teacher's know him/her by name in the hallway and never hesitate to ask for help when they need it. We love seeing our kids at school in their element. We love being a part of their daily lives. And we love helping to shape the future of the school in any way possible. This is our contribution back to our community, and our kids. It also makes a big difference.

Then there's the combination - those of us that give a little of our time to school when we can, and as much time at home as we can. We read to classes, donate school supplies, and buy store bought cupcakes for bake sales and class parties :). While in the same day, we take kids from one sport to the next, talking about the day in the car while eating from a packed cooler as we move from one kid's activity to the next. We get home, work on homework, review the days events and pack up to get ready to do it all again the next day.

No matter where YOU are in your level of involvement, it's important that you're just there. Knowing what your kids are doing everyday. What they have for homework, who their friends are, what their day was like and even what goes on in their classrooms. Asking questions - of your kids and of their school - can be what makes or breaks a year for your child. Know when there may be problems before it's too late. Celebrate their accomplishments. Understand their frustrations and help them get through their bad days.

Make the most out of this year with your children. Back to school isn't just for kids. Find out how you can make this your best year too.

What I learned on my summer vacation...

Remember writing these essays every fall when you got back to school? I sure do. I always tried to think of some grand way of spinning what usually was a pretty uneventful summer - in my eyes at least. Although looking back now, I had some pretty spectacular summer breaks (thanks, mom!). For me, this summer was unlike any summer I have ever had - and as I spoke to my 8 yr old the other day - I realized it was the same for him, as well. This was our first summer together since he was 2... No camp for him, no full time office job for me. It was the two of us against the world.

I learned this summer that patience is a lot more than a word. It's a gift that we give a kids and ourselves, and it takes time to unwrap and really understand the true power it holds. I learned that when given the opportunity to just play again - with no distractions - I have more fun than I did when I myself was an 8 year old in the summers. Slip n slides are more fun, sprinklers feel much better and water gun fights are become all out wars.

I found out that the power of my words, my tone and sheer facial expressions can turn a child upside down. Again - see the sentence above on patience. :) I taught myself that it's ok to turn my phone off, walk away from work and just be mom, wife and friend for an hour, a day or a few days - and you know what - the world keeps going on. I learned that just because they make amazing cupcakes on Cupcake Wars, doesn't mean my son and I can make them in my kitchen. We did have fun eating the frosting off the tops though. I learned that somethings are better left to the professionals on TV.

I learned that bumper boats are much more fun when you spin around and around and spray other people at full blast. I taught myself how to launch water balloons and also how to run from them when being tossed at me! I learned that when at the pool, it's OK to get wet! It's not just about sitting on the lounge chair, or dipping feet in from the side. It's about getting full on in the water, throwing diving sticks, going in water mushrooms, freezing when the water hits your belly, and racing to see who can swim the fastest. I found out what it felt like to race down a giant waterslide with my 8 yr old cheering me on. I beat fear.

I learned that even 8 yr olds are allowed to not like their moms every day. They have ups and downs that adults have - only they actually express it better than we do. I learned that it's ok not to have all the answers and to just say that sometimes and walk away. I taught myself to have time outs.

All in all, I learned that it's not always easy - being a mom, a wife, a friend, a teacher, a mentor, a business owner... any of it. But, it's how we learn to deal with it. Where we find the joy in each moment and how we find the teachable moments. I probably taught myself more this summer than I did my son. I am far from perfect - way far. But at the end of the summer, I am closer to being the mom I want to be, and my son is closer to knowing the mom he has. We became friends this summer. Knock down drag out friends, mind you, but friends none the less.

My son knows that I am a work in progress and now starting school in 5 days, he knows that it's ok that he is too.

What did you do on your summer vacation?

"Hello Fear, Let's Dance."

Fear. We all have it... It knows no age limits, no gender. And it certainly does not care WHAT you are doing when it appears. No courtesy whatsoever. While I use to run from fear, I've learned as a parent, that my children learn by what I do more times than not (cue the SHOCK & AWE sounds), so Fear and I now have a different relationship. We have to - my kids have to learn how to deal with it too.

So now I say, "Hello Fear. Let's Dance." And off we go. I match fear move for move. Tall buildings - no problem. I've shown my son I can conquer that glass elevator with his hand in mine...easy. Mouse in the house - piece of cake (um, well cheese, maybe), kinda. That one took a little more time, and a longer piece of music for us to "dance" to, but we got there. And my nemesis - the tall, dark, crazy fast water slides... yes, I see Fear waiting there for me just laughing. But not this time. I take my son's hand in mine, we walk up those 6 flights of stairs and we do it together. We conquer it - one turn and drop at a time. Guess who's afraid now? ;)

My point is, fear strikes at every angle. Our kids face it daily - and especially at back to school time. New teachers, new friends, old friends in different classes, new lunch tables, what to wear, what to eat, where to sit, who to play with, is the work too hard/too easy? And if your child just moved to a new school, or is transitioning to kindergarten, middle or high school this year, it's an entirely new set of challenges. Be prepared for changes with your child. Go through those changes with him and teach him to "dance" with fear - not run from it. Look it in the eye, and move with it, step for step, turn for turn. In the end, it will be your child leading - not fear.

But remember, your job before that is to show him that it can be done. Conquer your own fears with your child as much as you can, and when he can't be around, tell him about it.

Trust me, I couldn't have conquered half of my fears without my 8 yr old's hand in mine, saying, "You can do it, Mom. You can." Take that, fear.

School Supply Savings? YOU BET!

It's that time of year... and everywhere you turn there are new pencils, backpacks, markers, rulers, folders and everything else under the sun your kids need - and want - for heading back to school. So, where do you start? Who has the best prices? Where can you save? Are the discounts worth it? We've got some answers - thanks to Good Morning America and their awesome research! Start here before heading out into the Back to School Supply Jungle!

Click here for the Back to School Supplies Price Comparison Chart

Here's To a Great Year.

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