Rules to Live By

As our kids play sports, do team activities, or individual activities, they are taught simple rules to help make their experience a safer, more productive and fun one. As I was thinking about these rules and talking to my own son about them, I realized they apply to everything we do on a daily basis...school, work, relationships with friends/parents/siblings/teachers/co-workers/bosses/coaches and of course, teammates.

Here's our favorite list... We've printed them out, shared them and I even have them posted beside my computer in my office as a reminder to myself. Enjoy!

1. Know the Game


2. Pay attention to the Coach at all times


3. Know your Opponent


4. Be a Team Player


5. Practice a Winning Attitude


6. Find out what you do Best


7. Find out what you need to work on


8. Practice, practice, practice. And when you think your done...practice some more.


9. Learn from your mistakes.


10. Have Fun!

Getting an A+ in Teacher Communication

We all want A's...I don't care how old you are. In everything we do in life, we want to succeed, get pats on the back, high fives, "atta boys"... basically, life's "A+'s". So, when it comes to meeting with your child's teacher for parent/teacher conferences, aim for the the best possible outcome! Ace that meeting this year.

We tell our kids daily to do their homework. Now it's our turn... We have 10 minutes (give or take) with the person our children spends the majority of their time with during the week, learning and molding their minds for the future. Let me tell you.. you DON'T want to blow those 10 minutes on how organized the classroom is or what a great haircut the teacher has. Get in there and get down to business. This isn't coffee or happy hour, it's your CHILD'S FUTURE.

Here's a checklist to help you prepare (and yes - you can take notes with you to rattle off and questions to go over with the teacher - this helps keep you on track!):

• Talk to your child PRIOR to the conference to see if he/she has concerns you can address


• Discuss any at home issues that may be affecting the work at school


• Ask for specifics about your child's work. Don't be intimated by jargon you may not understand or really care about when in comes to "the majority" or "the class." This is YOUR CHILD'S time.


• Stay focused on your child - not on your past (as a child), your work, or your view on the curriculum. Stay in the present.


• Discuss common goals and your role in those.


• ASK for follow up emails or conversations if you feel they are necessary.

This is a partnership. Don't become antagonistic...the time with your child's teacher should be open and honest and a fair playing field or nothing will or can be accomplished.

If your child is having conflicts with the teacher that you are aware of, these should definitely be addressed. Make sure before having this discussion, that your child has given you solid, concrete examples of what has happened (as well as he/she can from a child's viewpoint). Ask your teacher for her insights, you may find that there are reasons why her decisions have been made, or you may find you need additional help in being heard. Either way, the dialogue needs to be open. Allow the teacher to first have the chance to work things out with your child before going to next level. Many times she may not known the extent of what was going on or being felt, and now is able to address the feelings and situation with your child.

Bottom line is that we all want what's best for the kids... to grow, to learn and become responsible, smart adults ready to help change the world!

If you find out your child needs addtional help or needs to be challenged more...contact us. We know where you can get some great in home tutoring.

Label Me This...

"Stupid is as Stupid Does." Remember these 5 words as said so famously by Tom Hanks, as Forrest Gump? I think the whole country was repeating this line for months and months after the movie came out...actually, we were probably repeating it for years.

In that movie, Forrest Gump believed that he was stupid...because that's what he was told. However, everything he did proved that theory wrong. He pushed through and showed everyone around him - those that knew him (and didn't know him) - just how "not stupid" he really was.

Now, bring this to today - to our kids. They get told so many messages to put in their own little playback devices in their minds. "Smartest" "Coolest" "Nerd" "Dork" "Pretty" "Chubby" "Fat" "Skinny" "Shorty" "Pale" "Brainiac" "Dumb" "Clown" "Goofy" "Bully" and yes, "Stupid". And these are only a handful of the labels our kids hear on a daily basis. It's no wonder when it comes to actually concentrating on what they should be concentrating on - school work - that they can't always do that. They are too worried about keeping up with the labels, or getting out from under them. And the worst part of all of it...Not one of them asked for these labels. As my 8 year old told me the other day, "There's just way too many names to tell you mom. Everyone calls someone something. Good and Bad."

He's right. I've realized in our house just how many labels we use for each other without even knowing it. We set expectations for each other, we put each other down - all without even realizing it. I have always had the rule that the word "stupid" was not allowed in the house under any circumstance. I thought I was doing such a great job with this rule...making my kids feel like they could do anything and never allowing them to put themselves down. But, what I didn't realize it all the other labels I was allowing.

So, my challenge to you and your family is to take the labels away. Like everything else, it all starts at home. Help our kids have one less issue to have to compete with everyday. Teach them that it's REALLY ok to just be themselves. Start a "label" jar or "label" poster where every time you hear one of your family members (mom and dad - this means you, too) put a label on someone (even joking!), you add a quarter to the jar, or a point to the poster. At the end of the month add up the points or the money and go out for ice cream, or have the person with the most points do someone else's chores for the week (the person who got the least points). Any way you chose to do it...just do it. You'll start to realize just how much you're actions at home are rubbing off on your kids - and next time they start to call someone a name or even just stand by while someone else does it - they'll think twice, or maybe even stop it.

Daily Planner.

Today, I am the clock. A buzzer that says "get up," "let's go" and "get ready."
Today, I am calendar. A lunch menu. A concierge.
Today, I am a short order cook, a waitress, a busboy, a dishwasher.
Today, I am a dry cleaner, a maid, a stylist and a personal assistant.

Today, I am a pastry chef, an artist, a sculptor, a critic.

Today, I am a producer, a cameraman, a director, a writer and an audience - all at once, and individually.

Today, I am the opposing team and the teammate.
Today, I am the coach.

Today, I am Mario, Darth Vader, Harry Potter and Yoda.
Today, we conquer the galaxy.

Today, I am the librarian and the story teller.
Today, I am the architect and the builder.

Today, I am the music teacher, the singer, the dancer and the groupie.

Today, I am the tutor, the science lab professor, the explorer, the museum guide and conqueror of fears.
Today, I am the taxi driver.

Today, I am the calculator and the dictionary.
Today, I am the teacher.

Today, I am the confidant and the comedian.
Today, I am the boss and the friend.

Today, I am mom.

Yesterday and Tomorrow?... See Today.

The "I" in Involved

Being involved is about more than baking cookies these days. It seems that everywhere you turn there is a way to sign up, donate, give time and more when it comes to being a part of your kids educations. There is no right or wrong way to do it. There's just finding the YOUR PLACE in involvement. The "I", as I like to call it. It doesn't matter what you do, just as long as you're doing it - and doing it the way that makes sense for you and your family.

Being involved can take the shape of many things. It can be the parent who is there every night that reads, checks the homework, plays "hi/lo" at the dinner table (one of my fave's), and recounts the daily gossip between family members. We keep up to date and up to speed on our kids lives like this. We find out what's going on, and we communicate. We are involved. This type of involvement may not take the shape of the daily school interaction of PTO meetings, volunteering in the classroom, or baking 200 homemade cupcakes, but it's serious involvement. And it counts - big time.

There's the involvement of the parent that volunteers at the school in any way needed. This parent is the first on the sign up sheets, chairs or co-chairs committees, teacher's know him/her by name in the hallway and never hesitate to ask for help when they need it. We love seeing our kids at school in their element. We love being a part of their daily lives. And we love helping to shape the future of the school in any way possible. This is our contribution back to our community, and our kids. It also makes a big difference.

Then there's the combination - those of us that give a little of our time to school when we can, and as much time at home as we can. We read to classes, donate school supplies, and buy store bought cupcakes for bake sales and class parties :). While in the same day, we take kids from one sport to the next, talking about the day in the car while eating from a packed cooler as we move from one kid's activity to the next. We get home, work on homework, review the days events and pack up to get ready to do it all again the next day.

No matter where YOU are in your level of involvement, it's important that you're just there. Knowing what your kids are doing everyday. What they have for homework, who their friends are, what their day was like and even what goes on in their classrooms. Asking questions - of your kids and of their school - can be what makes or breaks a year for your child. Know when there may be problems before it's too late. Celebrate their accomplishments. Understand their frustrations and help them get through their bad days.

Make the most out of this year with your children. Back to school isn't just for kids. Find out how you can make this your best year too.

What I learned on my summer vacation...

Remember writing these essays every fall when you got back to school? I sure do. I always tried to think of some grand way of spinning what usually was a pretty uneventful summer - in my eyes at least. Although looking back now, I had some pretty spectacular summer breaks (thanks, mom!). For me, this summer was unlike any summer I have ever had - and as I spoke to my 8 yr old the other day - I realized it was the same for him, as well. This was our first summer together since he was 2... No camp for him, no full time office job for me. It was the two of us against the world.

I learned this summer that patience is a lot more than a word. It's a gift that we give a kids and ourselves, and it takes time to unwrap and really understand the true power it holds. I learned that when given the opportunity to just play again - with no distractions - I have more fun than I did when I myself was an 8 year old in the summers. Slip n slides are more fun, sprinklers feel much better and water gun fights are become all out wars.

I found out that the power of my words, my tone and sheer facial expressions can turn a child upside down. Again - see the sentence above on patience. :) I taught myself that it's ok to turn my phone off, walk away from work and just be mom, wife and friend for an hour, a day or a few days - and you know what - the world keeps going on. I learned that just because they make amazing cupcakes on Cupcake Wars, doesn't mean my son and I can make them in my kitchen. We did have fun eating the frosting off the tops though. I learned that somethings are better left to the professionals on TV.

I learned that bumper boats are much more fun when you spin around and around and spray other people at full blast. I taught myself how to launch water balloons and also how to run from them when being tossed at me! I learned that when at the pool, it's OK to get wet! It's not just about sitting on the lounge chair, or dipping feet in from the side. It's about getting full on in the water, throwing diving sticks, going in water mushrooms, freezing when the water hits your belly, and racing to see who can swim the fastest. I found out what it felt like to race down a giant waterslide with my 8 yr old cheering me on. I beat fear.

I learned that even 8 yr olds are allowed to not like their moms every day. They have ups and downs that adults have - only they actually express it better than we do. I learned that it's ok not to have all the answers and to just say that sometimes and walk away. I taught myself to have time outs.

All in all, I learned that it's not always easy - being a mom, a wife, a friend, a teacher, a mentor, a business owner... any of it. But, it's how we learn to deal with it. Where we find the joy in each moment and how we find the teachable moments. I probably taught myself more this summer than I did my son. I am far from perfect - way far. But at the end of the summer, I am closer to being the mom I want to be, and my son is closer to knowing the mom he has. We became friends this summer. Knock down drag out friends, mind you, but friends none the less.

My son knows that I am a work in progress and now starting school in 5 days, he knows that it's ok that he is too.

What did you do on your summer vacation?

"Hello Fear, Let's Dance."

Fear. We all have it... It knows no age limits, no gender. And it certainly does not care WHAT you are doing when it appears. No courtesy whatsoever. While I use to run from fear, I've learned as a parent, that my children learn by what I do more times than not (cue the SHOCK & AWE sounds), so Fear and I now have a different relationship. We have to - my kids have to learn how to deal with it too.

So now I say, "Hello Fear. Let's Dance." And off we go. I match fear move for move. Tall buildings - no problem. I've shown my son I can conquer that glass elevator with his hand in mine...easy. Mouse in the house - piece of cake (um, well cheese, maybe), kinda. That one took a little more time, and a longer piece of music for us to "dance" to, but we got there. And my nemesis - the tall, dark, crazy fast water slides... yes, I see Fear waiting there for me just laughing. But not this time. I take my son's hand in mine, we walk up those 6 flights of stairs and we do it together. We conquer it - one turn and drop at a time. Guess who's afraid now? ;)

My point is, fear strikes at every angle. Our kids face it daily - and especially at back to school time. New teachers, new friends, old friends in different classes, new lunch tables, what to wear, what to eat, where to sit, who to play with, is the work too hard/too easy? And if your child just moved to a new school, or is transitioning to kindergarten, middle or high school this year, it's an entirely new set of challenges. Be prepared for changes with your child. Go through those changes with him and teach him to "dance" with fear - not run from it. Look it in the eye, and move with it, step for step, turn for turn. In the end, it will be your child leading - not fear.

But remember, your job before that is to show him that it can be done. Conquer your own fears with your child as much as you can, and when he can't be around, tell him about it.

Trust me, I couldn't have conquered half of my fears without my 8 yr old's hand in mine, saying, "You can do it, Mom. You can." Take that, fear.

School Supply Savings? YOU BET!

It's that time of year... and everywhere you turn there are new pencils, backpacks, markers, rulers, folders and everything else under the sun your kids need - and want - for heading back to school. So, where do you start? Who has the best prices? Where can you save? Are the discounts worth it? We've got some answers - thanks to Good Morning America and their awesome research! Start here before heading out into the Back to School Supply Jungle!

Click here for the Back to School Supplies Price Comparison Chart

Here's To a Great Year.

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The Countdown is ON! Back. To. School.

Whether it's two and half weeks, one week or even just a few days... The Back to School countdown is here! And even though some whining has started with the typical, "Not school already!" The majority of students actually are starting to get -- wait for it -- BORED. As you start to prepare the school supplies, new clothes, the "must have shoes," new backpacks, and other essentials... Tutor Doctor Chicago, your in home tutoring service, would like to make sure you are preparing AHEAD of time for the academic side of things too!

Is your child / student academically ready to dive in successfully to the new studies and assignments awaiting? Is he or her entering not only a new grade, but a new school, with nerves, apprehension, fear of failure, or with grades from the end of last school year that may already be a sign of being behind, or struggling with comprehension, which could lead to a difficult start to the new school year? Is this a pivotal grading year in which standardized achievement testing determines whether your child advances to the next grade - or where standard tests and class grades factor heavily towards college acceptance for your senior?
If the answer is "yes" to any of these, and even whether your student is in gifted and advanced placement places, or if he or she is in standard grade level classes, Tutor Doctor Chicago can help get your child's new school year off to a great start, enriched with confidence, and possessing the knowledge, tools and ability for success! Our highly trained tutors follow your child's specific school and grade curriculum, with a personalized, one-on-one in-home approach.
Forget playing taxi cab driver from school or after school activities to a learning center with larger student to single tutor ratios, that follow their own learning center materials instead of what your child specifically needs to learn. Leave it to our Tutor Doctor Chicago tutors to come to you, then proceed to get your student caught up, current, and then ahead of his or her school's and grade curriculum studies.

Help for Parents of A Struggling Reader

You think your child is having trouble with reading...whether it's instinct or it's been pointed out to you. It's never an easy realization, but it's one that can be worked on! Sometimes children just need more time, but in other cases, they may need extra help. Trust your instincts! You know your child better than anyone. If you think there's a problem, there probably is. This is where you have to be their voice.

Don't give up or necessarily believe or agree that your child "will grow out of it." You may be told this. The fact is, whenever a child has difficulty with reading or with school, it can be an overwhelming and emotional time for parents and for the child. The more you all learn, the less overwhelming it will seem and the more you'll be able to act effectively and quickly. You are the best advocate for your child – keep asking, learning, and acting to ensure that he or she has the best opportunity to succeed at reading. No one else is going to do this for you or your child. Remember that.

Take a look at the following 8 Steps to ensure that he or she receives the help needed to succeed - no matter what age or grade level.

1. Find out if your child needs extra help: Talk to your child's teachers and doctors. This could be more than just a school issue...it could be a vision or hearing issue, as well.

2. Consult with the school and other parents: Make an appointment with your child's teacher and possibly the guidance counselor/social worker to review a plan you all can work together on. Having everyone on the same page will benefit your child the most. Talking with other parents will many times unveil a wealth of information, as other children have gone through similar situations and you can tap into other resources families may have already found and tried.

3. Know your options:

• Find out about IDEA -Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) – that ensures that children diagnosed with a learning disability will receive special school services (for free).
• Check other sources:
  LD OnLine,
  National Center for Learning Disabilities,
  National Dissemination Center for Children With Disabilities,
  Schwab Learning,
  Wrightslaw
• Put EVERYTHING in writing! Keep all your research, conversations and concerns in a log so that when or if things don't get moving or get worked on, you have a copy of the issue and conversation. It's important to document everything as you begin to advocate for your child. Keep your decisions, your choices and your notes with you always. This is your child you are fighting for.

4. Ask the school to evaluate your child: Send the principal a written evaluation request requesting that a specialist (reading) review your child's progress. Also, make certain that your child is being evaluated in his/her strongest language, if English is not the primary language in your home.

5. Consider an outside evaluation from an independent expert like a child psychologist or outside specialist. You can find names by contacting local Parent Resource Centers in your area.

6. Consider finding an advocate. An advocate is a professional, education consultant or sometimes attorney, who specializes in helping parents resolve problems with a school. These professionals can be expensive. Your local Parent Training and Information Center or a Parent Resource Center may have information on advocates in your area.

7. Consider hiring a tutor. There are many tutoring options including private tutors, tutoring centers, educational therapists, and formalized programs. Ask for recommendations and do your homework to find a tutor who has specific knowledge and experience in working with children who have reading or learning disabilities. Some tutors also can work as an advocate for your child in the schools and will work directly with the school to help get your child the help he or she needs while in their care, and while at home. Tutor programs and curriculum should be designed completely around YOUR child and the uniqueness of how he/she learns. Make sure that question and topic is covered when you are doing your own "tutor homework."

8. Support your child at home by providing as much academic support and emotional support as you can. There are many extra activities you can work on at home without adding additional stress to your child, that shows you are there to help. Always letting him/her know that you are there no matter what is part of the success equation, as well. Focus and confidence go hand in hand with these issues, so continuing to provide encouragement during this time will be key to overcoming the struggles.

The square root of FUN!

I read a quote about math recently:

“Mathematics is the art of giving the same name to different things.”

I started thinking how true this is - and how true I could make it with creative activities over the summer that would teach/reinforce math in my family's daily routine. Basically, we would simply give "math" a different name. Oh yeah...and make it fun!

1. Spending in the Summer: We use this time to show and teach the value of money. It's easy to want to go and do everything when the kids are out of school, but helping them understand how much trips, activities, and other items cost helps them begin to understand the value of a dollar.

2. Create Budgets: You can do this with both young and older kids. Set goals for what they are saving for, but also give them options along the way to help them understand if they want to do other things, how long it takes to get back to goal amount.

3. Saving Incentives: Start a matching program! For every $.50 they save, you donate $.50 to their savings too. This helps motivate all ages!

4. Create "junior investors": Give your child a pretend dollar amount, $10,000 for example, and let them "invest" for a hypothetical portfolio for the family. Help them look at stocks and decide where they would like to invest the money, how much and find out why. Help them track it every day - up and down. At the end of their investment period, they can use their math skills to figure out how much money your hypothetical portfolio is now worth.

5. Shopping Time: Set a budget for the store, make a list of what is needed and have the kids find a way - with math - to stay at or under budget. All you do is accompany them, they do the shopping. If they stay under budget, set a reward for the family to enjoy! Ice cream trips are a GREAT reward for everyone.

It's amazing the ways and places you can find to make math part of your daily routine - and your kids don't even realize how much they're learning!

Tutor Doctor Quiz:

The two biggest questions we get at Tutor Doctor:
Take our 2 question quiz... Then, watch the video and see how well you did :).
1. Where do we tutor? At our location or in your home?
2. Do we work with our own pre-designed curriculum, or do we build a tailored curriculum around your student's learning needs and styles?

We're here for you, your students and their success. Contact us for more info on how we can help you.

Kids & Sports...Where to Draw the Line?

There is no secret that sports are a part of my family's life - and in a big way. Sports have helped my son in ways that I can't even count. But, even I know that it can get away from us easily. Days are filled with hockey, nights are filled with hockey. Bank accounts are emptied from...you guessed it - hockey. We have to find a way to balance it.

Many parents are having this same challenge. Sports bring balance to so many kids lives. Sports can help increase productivity and focus in school, decrease obesity and help with focus, discipline and responsibility. The problem that can happen is that the sport can overtake a child's life...therefore it overtakes a family's life.

So where do you draw the line? How do you know when to draw it? What if YOUR KID could be the next GREAT ONE? The Wall Street Journal recently published a great article on this exact subject with some great examples of how some families across the country are cutting back, and balancing out - while still keeping their kids doing what they love to do. Drawing the Line on Youth Sports will definitely give you more to think about - and maybe more to talk about with your own players...and coaches.

As our hockey coach says, at the end of the season, whether travel or house league, no matter HOW many games you played or how much time you logged, it should be about:
1. Did your player learn something this season?
2. Did your player have fun this season?
3. Did your player increase in at least 1 skill this season?
That's what it should be about. Well, that and making sure your family was right there with you, cheering you on.

Try hard. Have fun. And always...have a pizza party after wards! You're never too old for that.

TD Takeaway of the Day: An App a Day, Keeps Learning OK!

We all know that keeping our kids focused on some sort of learning activity is the way to go over the summer. The amount of knowledge lost over the 3 months is amazing if we don't keep their brains tuned and trained in some sort of way!

If your schedule is as nuts as our family's is during the summer, finding the time to make sure math is focused on (or science, reading, maybe a foreign language), well, it's almost next to impossible some days. So, I turned to my iPhone. Now we have AWESOME math apps to keep with us and keep my son's brain in full gear no matter where we are or how much - or how little - time we may have. Whether it's addition, subtraction, multiplication, time or money skills...the iPhone has it covered for us! He even uses the eReader to read new books when we forget our library books at home and we're stuck in the car, the ice rink, the grocery store - you name it!

But shhhh... he feels like it's a video game. So, the amount of time he "plays" on the apps is awesome. It's learning and he doesn't even realize it!

TD Takeaway of the Day: TNT!

TNT! Someone said this to me recently as I was trying to decide when to start a new exercise program. "TNT" he said. I just stared blankly at him. "TODAY... NOT TOMORROW!"

TNT has become a new motto around our house and one that I am instilling in the families I work with. Think about the decisions you are faced with everyday. The decisions you put off making. The decisions your kids put of making. And of course, the decisions you put off making for your kids. Make TNT part of your life! Say it out loud when everyone is trying to decide what to do. When the procrastination and excuses start (and we all know they will), yell out"TNT!" You'll get funny looks at first, but I promise, it'll start making a difference. Put up sticky notes or index cards with "TNT" on them around the house... keep those excuses away and your determination in the starting block.

It's funny how little things can make big changes in our lives. All of those "I'll start it tomorrows" you've said over the months...well, it's time to TNT those. Start the reading time. Try the new math worksheets the teacher sent home for summer. Start the one-on-one Mom/Dad and Kiddo time. Pick a date for that family game night you've been planning for so long. Sit down for that family meal you keep meaning to do. Take the cooking lessons. Try the karate class. JUST GO TO THE GYM :). Learn a foreign language. Start a journal.

No matter what it is... Just remember "TNT!"

Understanding Learning Styles

You may have heard this buzz term: "Learning Style." As in, "What is your child's learning style?" Well, it's more than just a fad term... It's a term that not only should you get to know, but also understand how it applies to your child - or even you. It affects all of us - from how we learn in school, to how we effectively work in our careers.

Students, in fact all individuals, are most effective when they are taught in their personal learning style. There are 3 major types of learners: visual (seeing), auditory (hearing/listening), and tactile/kinesthetic (touching/experiencing). While most individuals can learn using any one of these styles, generally most have one for which they show a stronger likeness. Take a look at the three detailed descriptions below... which one do you feel that you are most like? How about your child/student? Are you alike? Do you feel like his or her study habits could be tailored more to incorporate these styles?

A Closer Look...

Visual Learners - Visual learners are those who generally think in terms of pictures. They often prefer to see things written down in a handout, text or on the overhead. They find maps, graphs, charts, and other visual learning tools to be extremely effective. They remember things best by seeing something written.

Auditory Learners - Auditory learners are those who generally learn best by listening. They typically like to learn through lectures, discussions, and reading aloud. They remember best through hearing or saying items aloud.

Kinesthetic Learners- Kinesthetic, also called tactile, learners are those who learn best through touching, feeling, and experiencing that which they are trying to learn. They remember best by writing or physically manipulating the information.

At the intersection of Parent St., Child Rd. and Teacher Ave.

Finding the Shot

This one is personal. I get asked many times why I got into this business - and honestly, I could probably answer it on many different levels: "I've always been an entrepreneur and loved owning my own business." "Being my own boss is great!" "Working with kids and their families is wonderful." There are so many answers... I could go on and on and on. But, honestly, there is one reason that hits very close to home which answers it all. And it centers around a puck, a sitck, and a sheet of ice...oh and and my son.

I lost my son in 2nd grade. Not really lost him, like I couldn't physically find him, but emotionally lost him. I LOST who he was, his smile, his energy, his spirit...HIM. It was during a move, a transition for him at the beginning of the school year. My son - who is by all counts a pretty spectacular kid (ok, so I'm biased) - is pretty shy, but over time truly becomes the "Mayor'' or "Norm" (from Cheers) pretty quickly in most situations. He ended up in a class, in a school, that wasn't him, with a teacher that never truly saw him. Because of this, he lost himself and everything about him. We went from a kid who loved to read, to a kid who hated to read. A kid that loved math, to a kid that threw his homework across the table because he was "stupid" (and we don't use that word in our house.) A kid who loved being with other kids, to a kid who wanted to just be at home. Like I said, I lost my son.

However, we found hockey. He found hockey. He found a uniform, a hockey mask, a jersey, a stick, a place that he could be anyone he wanted to be. A place that he was invincible. And it was from hockey that we started seeing our son come back to life. When he stepped on the ice, he was awake again, smiling again. Coaches saw him, people believed in him... and more than that, he believed in himself. Two times a week I saw my son again... If you're a mom, you can understand how this felt.

We ended up moving and into another school district where our son was welcomed with open arms and open minds. Within days I saw glimpses of the old kid I had always known. He was playing again, making friends again and loving school again. He had a teacher that took an interest in him and saw him for the child he truly IS. It was amazing.

He once told me that when he got sad in the old school, he imagined he was playing hockey and it made him smile. I have no doubt that the worst months that we went through would have been even worse without those skates and ice...in fact, I know it. I sit here today still watching him with tears in my eyes everytime knowing that he found who HE is through a tough journey, but he found it nonetheless. I have Tutor Doctor because of my son's journey... I help other families and kids find their voices when no one else maybe listening, and while I'm doing it, I can make sure they have the help in school that they need to succeed.

You never know where your goals will come from. For us, we scored on the ice... Find where your child becomes invincible, if only for an hour a week and run with it. Cultivate it. Embrace it. This is a journey you'll take together and you'll never be sorry for it.

S-P-I-R-I-T

Ok, I'll admit it... I have a soft spot for cheerleaders. Some may even say that as an adult I still walk around with virtual poms poms in my hands at most times (and when they aren't in my hands, they're probably in my in car :) That attitude honestly has kept me going during some pretty rough times - and has kept others around me going too. What I have learned it that it's the spirit that brings people up, gets them to smile and realize that they can keep going.

I found this to be true on many days as a teacher and even more so now as a parent and business owner and educator/advocate that works with families and children of all ages. Enthusiasm is passed on. It's not taught. It's actually a gift we can give kids from a very early age. Enthusiasm translates into so many areas of children's lives and up through the teen years and into young adult hood - in ways we have all probably forgotten about as adults. Being able to get excited about who you are, what you have done, what you can accomplish and what others around you have and are able to accomplish is a beautiful thing. A "pay it forward" type of thing.

I recently saw a quote a my son's Kyuki-Do studio that read, "Enthusiasm is caught, not taught."Encourage your kids to be excited and enthusiastic about what they do. While it may get loud and somewhat over the top sometimes (I know it does at our house), it's a good thing. It's creative. It's the brain working overtime. It's friendships being built. It's education.

Teach your child to foster this enthusiasm...and you know what, CATCH IT from him or her! Enjoy it with them! It's definitely better to have this spirit than the one so many adults (myself included) get lost in on so many days. Remember what it's like to get lost in something you love.

As strange as it sounds... Keep your own virtual pom poms in your car, too. I'm never ashamed or embarrassed of being the cheerleader for kids and adults alike. I'm helping them catch their enthusiasm. Are you?

TD Takeaway of the Day: Read, Read, Read!

I found this on Twitter and just loved all of the great tips from various moms that wrote in! The beloved reader series, I CAN READ, asked moms to submit their favorite reading strategies for getting kids to read more in the summer months. I think you'll enjoy just as much as I did!

For us, we have a family that loves to read. Our kids keep books in the cars, stacks by the bed, in the family room, kitchen...wherever. They are part of our life. And one thing that works wonders in the summer to get extra time is the more time logged in the day, the longer you get to stay up at night! Our 8 yr old loves it!

Enjoy these other tips! TwitterMoms!

Turn Around.

As I was watching an interview with Sean and Leigh Anne Touhy I was struck by a simple phrase they said, "Turn Around." Sean and Leigh Anne, for those of you that aren't aware, were made famous by the movie "The Blind Side" that captured the amazing story of their life after adopting Michael Oher off the streets of Memphis and transforming his life through love, family and education. Michael, as many of you know, went on to graduate high school, college and become a future first round draft pick and NFL star for the Baltimore Ravens. NONE of this would have happened without someone turning around.

One simple phrase, Turn Around. That's what did it. Leigh Anne said to her husband when she saw Michael walking on the streets that night when they were driving home - the night that they picked him up. Literally, they turned around and they put him in their car. And that was that. But from that moment Micheal's life was turned around.

Life gets busy for all of us and we have a way of always looking in front of us, forgetting to see what's going on in every other direction. TURN AROUND and see others. TURN AROUND and see how YOU can help. TURN AROUND and see what amazing things your child is doing, discovering and feeling. TURN AROUND and ask if YOU can PLAY! TURN AROUND and PARTICIPATE.

Everyday, I listen to parents and students and help them have a voice when they may not have had one before. Many times the journey to me has been long and tough. There are plenty of kids that are slipping between the cracks because no one is helping them find their voice - or no one is hearing them once they find it.

TURN AROUND and BE PRESENT. Don't live your life thinking and waiting for someone else to do it - because they may not. Give a child a hand, an education, a round of applause. At the end of the day, you both will feel fuller than you ever thought possible. By simply turning around, you can turn around and empower a life.

Thanks Leigh Anne Tuohy.

"Mom / Dad... I'm Bored!"

How many parents have heard this phrase this summer? Probably too many of you to count, right? Doesn't matter how old your kids are, the word "bored" go across the ages. I find myself saying phrases that my own mother use to say to me - and ones that I promised I would never say to my own kids. "You can't be bored, you just woke up." "Only boring people get bored." "There are a million things to do." "Grab the vacuum, there's plenty of things to clean." "Grab a book and read." And of course, "Don't you have a room FULL of things to NOT be bored with?" What I forget is that these didn't work with me (cue the eye rolling) and they don't work with my kids. (cue the shock music)

Our friends at FoxValleyMom.com put together a list of GREAT solutions/ideas for an enjoyable summer - here's just a few - some more perfect for teens, some perfect for all ages:

1. Work at a local business: Why? Because at some point we ALL need to understand the importance of customer service (in my opinion).
2. Volunteer: There is NOTHING more rewarding - and even though your kids may not admit it at first, they will feel this too.
3. Take a Class / Brush up on Skills: There are SO many options during the summer...pottery, martial arts, painting, theatre, learn a language!
   
4. Residential Work: Good old fashioned lawn mowing, mother's helpers, babysitting, dog walking, flower watering
5. Recreational Activities: Waterparks, mini golf, go karts, the Zoo, bike rides and SO much more!
   

Read the entire article and check out all the great resources that FoxValleyMom.com has for the hip mom and her kids in the Fox Valley area! I promise...the words, "I'm bored" will soon be a distant memory.

Diary of an... Engaged Kid!

So, on the heels of the ever popular and always entertaining "Diary of Wimpy Kid" movie and book series, my own son - a rising 3rd grader - is now setting off in creating his own "Diary/Journal" of his own life and times. This got me to thinking...What other books are out there that could create a new world of adventure or stir up a side of his imagination that maybe hadn't been tapped into yet?

Always on the lookout for some new way to engage him - and the rest of our family - in some new activity (other than another PS3 or Wii game), I have set out on a quest. And trust me, it's amazing what you can find. We've gone through the entire Harry Potter set and cast spells around our house on each other to get things done. We've turned our house into the Millenium Falcon and made life size cut outs from our favorite characters of the Star Wars BOOKS (not movies... the books are far more in depth and awesome for a kid to get lost in them - especially on the Boba/Jengo Fett front). We're introducing Big Nate into our family and seeing if he and Greg Heffley (of "Diary" fame) could actually be friends. We've discovered the amazing talents of Matt Christopher and his sports books, and found a way to tie a love of reading into an 8 yr olds love of hockey.

Next on the list...Reading what I consider to be some of my childhood classics - Rohald Dahl books. Imagine what we can do with "James and the Giant Peach", "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory", "The Fantasic Mr.Fox" and "Boy."

The coolest part of all of this? Every adventure is being recorded in my son's "Diary"...all started by a book. He's even titled his version "Diary of a Wimpy Kid. The new wimp." I have to say, I was pretty proud. He's tied in his love of reading, with his love of writing (which we had to really work with him on in 2nd grade), and his love of drawing (not sure where he gets that from!)

Create your adventure with your kids. And make it a family affair...re-read classics with them, or new series for the first time. Make it a family book club. You'll be amazed and thrilled at the fun times and outcomes that you get from each discussion and activity you can create. Plus, you get to read some pretty cool books that as an adult you normally wouldn't get to read!

If you're looking for suggestions on starting some activities or a family book club reading list, let me know! We certainly have lots of them.

Here are some GREAT ideas for Day Trips focused completely around children's books that get you and your kids thinking - and take reading and discussing to an entire new level! Have fun!
Reading Day Trips!

TD Takeaway of the Day:

I read a quote from a special ed teacher today that really struck me...
"I am constantly asking myself: What can I do for children? This simple yet profound question provides the focus I need when the going gets tough. This question keeps me in the mode of turning my passion into performance. I’m talking about purposeful performance that links my core values with an empathetic awareness of the views of those around me."

All children should be fortunate enough to have teachers who act, feel, think and teach in this way every day. All teachers should remember WHY they started teaching in the first place. And all parents, well, we just need to remember that this is a JOINT effort and we can get as much out of our kids, schools and teachers as we put into it.

Top 5 Questions to ask when looking for a tutor

There are many different tutoring services out there and it can be a dizzying adventure trying to pick the right tutor for yourself or your child. Here are some things to keep in mind when choosing a tutor or a tutoring service.

1. Is there a fee for an assessment or consultation and is it required?
Some services require you to pay upfront for an assessment before they will recommend a package. These fees can range from $50-$200. You may go through the assessment and then find you cannot afford the tutoring services proposed.

2. Do they have customized packages?
Some tutoring services only have standard packages and will not be flexible.

3. Do they use their own curriculum or do thy follow the student's curriculum?

Some tutoring services will introduce the student to a brand new curriculum in addition to the curriculum the student has to absorb at school. If you or your child are struggling, learning a new curriculum rather than focusing on the existing curriculum may not be wise.

4. Do they provide in-home tutoring or center based tutoring?
Some tutoring services are center based only which means one more trip for the student and for the parent/guardian to fit into a busy day's schedule, while other tutor services come to the home or will meet the student at a convenient location.

5. What is the tutor to student ratio?
Some services will have a 4 to 1 student to tutor ratio or higher, while in-home tutoring services can offer a much more desirable and focused one-to-one tutor to student ratio. If you are looking for individualized attention and need a focused learning atmosphere, one-to-one will be much more conducive to improved learning skills and better grades.

No matter what route you go, make sure you do your own homework, and that not only are your child's learning needs being met, but their personality is too. Your student's tutor can make all the difference in the world.

TD Takeaway of the Day:

“Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand.”
Sometimes, we all forget to do this with our kids. Find out how your child learns and what makes him excited. Help them be a part of all of that their world has to offer. I promise, it'll make your world, seem just a little bit better.

Communities need to work together to avoid students' academic "slide" during summer break

When school children close their books in June, they too often forget about reading, writing and arithmetic until September rolls around.

For teachers that means a fall filled with remedial work. Educators typically spend four to six weeks getting students back to where they were at the end of the previous academic year. A study done in the Grand Rapids Public Schools from 2003 and 2004 showed the summer learning loss reached almost 40 percent for some students.

The phenomenon is so universally recognized it has a name: summer slide.

A group of local organizers is looking for a way to halt the slide. The campaign, if done right, can lead to educational efficiency, relieving teachers of the chore of covering the same ground. In addition, the developing program would address inequities. Children in lower-income homes are more likely to suffer summer learning loss than children in middle-class and upper-income homes.

Beyond summer programs that turn attention to books instead of video games, educators should explore the way the school year is structured. Does a long summer break make sense anymore? Does the 180-day school year — altered to 1,098 hours of instruction in Michigan — best serve students, especially when countries that are our economic rivals keep kids in classrooms longer? Should local districts experiment more with year-round school as a solution to learning loss?

Studies in the United States show that all students, regardless of socioeconomic background, fall behind in math skills over the summer, losing on average 2.6 months. Educators believe this is because math isn’t typically practiced outside the classroom.

In reading, however, income disparity sharpens. Children in low-income households lose on average two months in reading ability. Middle- and upper-income children hold their own or make slight gains. Experts believe that lower-income youngsters have fewer opportunities for brain-stimulating cultural enrichment during summer months, whether trips to zoos, museums or national parks.

The academic gap extends far beyond a single school year. A study done by researchers at Johns Hopkins University tracked Baltimore school children from 1st grade through age 22. The study found that summer learning accounted for 65 percent of the learning gap between upper-income students who attended college and low-income high school dropouts.

In other words, the decline is cumulative. Effectively addressing summer loss, and doing so early on, can make a huge difference for youngsters who might otherwise fall off the track academically and fall through the cracks of society.

A number of local organizations from government, non-profits and churches came together recently to address summer slide. The groups include the Grand Rapids Public Schools, Heart of West Michigan United Way and the Douglas and Maria DeVos Foundation. Those involved believe they can make use of existing summer programs and try to use them more effectively. That goal merits support.

One example of a simple program that works is in the Kalamazoo Public Schools. There every student entering sixth grade next fall will be mailed eight books over the course of the summer. The students will be asked to read the books and send postcards, which will be answered. A pilot study done with some incoming sixth graders showed participants advanced four months in reading test scores. Those who didn’t take part lost one-and-a-half months.

The Kalamazoo program this year will involve 900 youngsters and cost the district $74,000. That’s a modest sum for substantial gains.

Parents, of course, are the ultimate tutors. They should insist that when their kids aren’t outside riding bikes or running around, they’re spending at least some of their summer days reading books. Whether “Treasure Island,” “Harry Potter” or “Clifford the Big Red Dog,” a world of possibility awaits, now and in the future.

Source - Grand Rapids Press Editorial Board 03.10.10

Make it count

I found this quote today and I instantly connected with it.
"Do the difficult things while they are easy and do great things while they are small. A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."

What will your journey be? Can you take your family with you? What kind of journey are you showing you kids everyday? I realized that too often I forget that everyday is an opportunity for greatness. That's what I want to instill in my kids.

My own son has had his struggles finding his place - last year was one of his, and our, toughest so far. Watching him struggle in school, with friends, with transitions and with his own anxieties and fears broke my heart hourly. But, we found our voice. He found his voice. And we created and turned it into one of the best adventures to date. It was all part of finding out how strong we all were - and finding what our path was together. It led me to the journey I'm on now. I get to be the voice for so many other families that don't have one, can't find theirs, or simply have no idea how to have theirs heard.

Find your journey. Start today.

Today's Learners

Take a look at this video...and see how your student fits in.
A Vision of K-12 Students Today

Make sure your student is getting the most from the world he or she lives in. Ask the questions, look closely, be involved and pay attention...but most of all listen to what your student is saying. Each student is unique and should be seen as such. Teaching to their own characteristics, strengths, weaknesses, likes, dislikes and personalities is something that can be done...Maybe not always IN the classroom, but we can do it WITH the classroom.

Summer's Here...Now What?

Summer is finally here... Long sunny days. Playdates. Beach and Pool trips. Popsicles at the Park. Ahhh the life of a child out of school. But, what happens to everything they learned in school? How do we as parents keep it fresh and keep them motivated? There has to be more to the days of summer than just watching our kids get up, turn the latest TV or video game on, and begin to tune out the rest of the world. Right?? :) How do we keep everything fresh and fun - and keep them engaged at the same time?

Thanks to our friends at Psychologytoday.com for these great bits of information!

1. What ultimately is the goal a parent should have in mind when they select/offer ideas to their children of what to do this summer?

Parents should always be thinking about what they want their children to get out of their summer. Take a look at anything that fosters kids' physical, intellectual, social, spiritual, environmental, cultural, and artistic development. In other words, what are the experiences you can provide that will further your children's greater understanding of themselves and the world in which they live.

Also, parents should focus on summer activities that encourage certain values that parents want to instill in their children, for example, hard work, compassion, or learning about other cultures. If children are into sports, the arts, or another specialized area, activity-specific camps or other experiences devoted to these are a great way to allow them to enjoy themselves and help them improve and strive toward their goals. If you can't find one that matches your schedule or your budget, try putting one on yourself for your children and their friends. It may sound like a lot of work, but actually it's a lot of fun and the experience you'll get out of it with your children and their friends is priceless. There are many ways to do this - a week, three days, etc.. And pick a theme. You can ask friends to bring supplies, as well. Keep it to a half day or few hours and only a few children. At the end of the week, have a final project to send home with the kids! You wont believe how much fun this time can be!!

Of course, having some summer activities that are just plain fun is important too.

2. What role does our popular culture play in these decisions?

Parents feel a lot of pressure these days to "keep up with the Joneses," meaning they feel like if they're not doing what the Joneses are doing, then they will be viewed as bad parents. My advice is to "make the Joneses jealous." While the Joneses are doing what everyone else is doing (sometimes quite unhappily), you can be doing what your family wants to do. The ability to make this decision to buck the system comes from thinking deliberately about your family's values and interests and making conscious choices based on those priorities.

3. What specific ideas can you offer parents to do with their 13-18 year olds this summer?

Summer jobs are one of the most powerful experiences teenagers can have. I think manual labor or mundane labor is especially good learning experience for teens, particularly in the privileged and insulated world in which many kids are raised these days. I worked as a waitress and retail cashier all through high school and college. It showed me the value of hard work, the direct relationship between earning a wage and serving others (literally), and how and what most people expect from others who are working for them. It also taught me the VALUE of being a great communicator.

Summers are also a great time to get kids involved in household responsibilities. They should be assigned chores that contribute to the upkeep and functioning of the house. Painting a room, cleaning out the garage, or being in charge of recycling are all great ways to teach kids responsibility and get the house into shape.

Family activities should also be included summer plans. Family outings are a great way for you to connect with and strengthen your relationship with their kids and do fun things together. The best summer family activities are those in which parents and children share a new and unique experience, visit a place totally unfamiliar to everyone, or do something that requires a family to interact in different ways. For example, one family I know spent two weeks helping to build a house for Habitat for Humanity. Another family spent a week camping the mountains.

4. What role does boredom play in summer activities? Does boredom have any value?

Boredom happens when kids have too much free time on their hands. And summers, when kids aren't in school and may not have as much structure in their days, are a potential breeding ground for boredom.

I still remember to this day, my mom saying to me "Only boring people get bored." While this may not have been the greatest message, it defintely GOT to me and I understood it and remembered it throughout my life. I never wanted to be seen as a boring person, so I always made sure that I found and had something to do.

Boredom can also be a great tool for development if it's handled properly. Too often these days, when kids get bored, parents give them something to entertain them, such as put them in front of a TV or computer or send them to the mall. But boredom can encourage creativity and self-initiative. When kids tell their parents they are bored, the parents should say, "So, what are you going to do about it?" Parents can offer activities that are healthy, such as organizing informal soccer games, going to parks and museums, or doing chores around the house (that will get kids motivated to find something to do for themselves!).

At the same time, I do think a part of summer should be devoted to down time, meaning just hanging out at home and taking it easy (but that doesn't mean sitting in front of a screen for easy entertainment). Kids need time to rest and recharge. So much of kids' lives these days are programmed and go, go, go. But this time should not comprise the bulk of the summer, but rather be a short period, perhaps a week, before school begins.

5. How does a parent address the fact if a child does NOT want to do, attend or volunteer at a certain activity?

There is a saying, "Doing nothing is not an option." Kids have to do something with their summers. You can give your kids some options from which they must choose, including some form of work. But I believe that kids should be forced to do something.

One family I know has a rule: one thing the parents want the kids to do and one thing the kids want to do. This rule amounts to a win-win for parents and kids.

Make the most out of your family's summer! Have fun, work smart, and learn always.