Label Me This...

"Stupid is as Stupid Does." Remember these 5 words as said so famously by Tom Hanks, as Forrest Gump? I think the whole country was repeating this line for months and months after the movie came out...actually, we were probably repeating it for years.

In that movie, Forrest Gump believed that he was stupid...because that's what he was told. However, everything he did proved that theory wrong. He pushed through and showed everyone around him - those that knew him (and didn't know him) - just how "not stupid" he really was.

Now, bring this to today - to our kids. They get told so many messages to put in their own little playback devices in their minds. "Smartest" "Coolest" "Nerd" "Dork" "Pretty" "Chubby" "Fat" "Skinny" "Shorty" "Pale" "Brainiac" "Dumb" "Clown" "Goofy" "Bully" and yes, "Stupid". And these are only a handful of the labels our kids hear on a daily basis. It's no wonder when it comes to actually concentrating on what they should be concentrating on - school work - that they can't always do that. They are too worried about keeping up with the labels, or getting out from under them. And the worst part of all of it...Not one of them asked for these labels. As my 8 year old told me the other day, "There's just way too many names to tell you mom. Everyone calls someone something. Good and Bad."

He's right. I've realized in our house just how many labels we use for each other without even knowing it. We set expectations for each other, we put each other down - all without even realizing it. I have always had the rule that the word "stupid" was not allowed in the house under any circumstance. I thought I was doing such a great job with this rule...making my kids feel like they could do anything and never allowing them to put themselves down. But, what I didn't realize it all the other labels I was allowing.

So, my challenge to you and your family is to take the labels away. Like everything else, it all starts at home. Help our kids have one less issue to have to compete with everyday. Teach them that it's REALLY ok to just be themselves. Start a "label" jar or "label" poster where every time you hear one of your family members (mom and dad - this means you, too) put a label on someone (even joking!), you add a quarter to the jar, or a point to the poster. At the end of the month add up the points or the money and go out for ice cream, or have the person with the most points do someone else's chores for the week (the person who got the least points). Any way you chose to do it...just do it. You'll start to realize just how much you're actions at home are rubbing off on your kids - and next time they start to call someone a name or even just stand by while someone else does it - they'll think twice, or maybe even stop it.

Daily Planner.

Today, I am the clock. A buzzer that says "get up," "let's go" and "get ready."
Today, I am calendar. A lunch menu. A concierge.
Today, I am a short order cook, a waitress, a busboy, a dishwasher.
Today, I am a dry cleaner, a maid, a stylist and a personal assistant.

Today, I am a pastry chef, an artist, a sculptor, a critic.

Today, I am a producer, a cameraman, a director, a writer and an audience - all at once, and individually.

Today, I am the opposing team and the teammate.
Today, I am the coach.

Today, I am Mario, Darth Vader, Harry Potter and Yoda.
Today, we conquer the galaxy.

Today, I am the librarian and the story teller.
Today, I am the architect and the builder.

Today, I am the music teacher, the singer, the dancer and the groupie.

Today, I am the tutor, the science lab professor, the explorer, the museum guide and conqueror of fears.
Today, I am the taxi driver.

Today, I am the calculator and the dictionary.
Today, I am the teacher.

Today, I am the confidant and the comedian.
Today, I am the boss and the friend.

Today, I am mom.

Yesterday and Tomorrow?... See Today.

The "I" in Involved

Being involved is about more than baking cookies these days. It seems that everywhere you turn there is a way to sign up, donate, give time and more when it comes to being a part of your kids educations. There is no right or wrong way to do it. There's just finding the YOUR PLACE in involvement. The "I", as I like to call it. It doesn't matter what you do, just as long as you're doing it - and doing it the way that makes sense for you and your family.

Being involved can take the shape of many things. It can be the parent who is there every night that reads, checks the homework, plays "hi/lo" at the dinner table (one of my fave's), and recounts the daily gossip between family members. We keep up to date and up to speed on our kids lives like this. We find out what's going on, and we communicate. We are involved. This type of involvement may not take the shape of the daily school interaction of PTO meetings, volunteering in the classroom, or baking 200 homemade cupcakes, but it's serious involvement. And it counts - big time.

There's the involvement of the parent that volunteers at the school in any way needed. This parent is the first on the sign up sheets, chairs or co-chairs committees, teacher's know him/her by name in the hallway and never hesitate to ask for help when they need it. We love seeing our kids at school in their element. We love being a part of their daily lives. And we love helping to shape the future of the school in any way possible. This is our contribution back to our community, and our kids. It also makes a big difference.

Then there's the combination - those of us that give a little of our time to school when we can, and as much time at home as we can. We read to classes, donate school supplies, and buy store bought cupcakes for bake sales and class parties :). While in the same day, we take kids from one sport to the next, talking about the day in the car while eating from a packed cooler as we move from one kid's activity to the next. We get home, work on homework, review the days events and pack up to get ready to do it all again the next day.

No matter where YOU are in your level of involvement, it's important that you're just there. Knowing what your kids are doing everyday. What they have for homework, who their friends are, what their day was like and even what goes on in their classrooms. Asking questions - of your kids and of their school - can be what makes or breaks a year for your child. Know when there may be problems before it's too late. Celebrate their accomplishments. Understand their frustrations and help them get through their bad days.

Make the most out of this year with your children. Back to school isn't just for kids. Find out how you can make this your best year too.